Broken

How do you fix something that’s broken?

I guess there are many ways depending on the item, but I’ve learned that sometimes no matter how much you try to fix something, say glue it back together, it’s just never the same. Inevitably it falls back apart and needs mending over and over again.

And that’s not such a bad thing I do suppose.  But it’s not my style for sure.  One of my “negatives” is an inability to keep mending things over and over again. I have a three strikes rule:  after three attempts, honest and true attempts, I usually walk away.  I let things be and start anew.

I developed this way of being when things just seemed so overwhelming at one point and I had too much on my plate – no matter how much I prioritized I never could work on everything at least once.  Things got neglected without so much as an attempt by me because I never seemed to have enough time.  So, I decided to become more efficient and give everything, everyone a shot.  How quickly could I handle certain things if I gave myself a time frame?  A limit?  I could attempt every situation, every relationship, accomplish what needed to be accomplished to the best of my ability, and know that at the very least I attempted to mend, fix,  and help everything (and everyone) in front of me. And anything that didn’t work out, anything that didn’t stay glued together was obviously – just not meant to be.  Then I could feel good about letting it go.  No longer would I feel bad about just not having the time to “get to it”.  At the very least, I tried, it didn’t work, I’m done.

But what I’ve come to realize over the years is that some things are so precious that once they are abandoned they are gone forever.  Once I walk away, there’s usually nothing left but maybe a faint memory.  There are no replacements.  Sometimes in my haste to move onward and “let go” I’ve lost out on something that was so unique, that even in its broken state, could have given me so much more joy than having nothing at all. I mean, a broken diamond, could still be a bunch of little pretty diamonds, shining brilliantly and still beautiful in magnificent ways, right?

Maybe some things are not meant to be fixed at all.  Maybe, sometimes when things are broken, that’s exactly how they’re supposed to be. Their purpose or functionality might have changed, but, if given the chance, they could still be beautiful  in ways I’d never even considered, right?

Maybe, what I keep seeing as broken, is merely a different form of growth or newness. And maybe, just maybe, it’s not my job to fix, help, or mend everything and everyone.

How do you deal with the broken “things” in your life?  I’m so very curious.

…. I’m just thinking out loud today.

6 thoughts on “Broken

  1. I think these lines say it all;

    “Maybe, what I keep seeing as broken, is merely a different form of growth or newness. And maybe, just maybe, it’s not my job to fix, help, or mend everything and everyone.”

    Some things, like relationships and human beings, are bound to get broken and sometimes what results from that is a different form of growth and maybe a fresh new start, something beautiful can grow from it. And then again somethings need to be thrown away after they’re broken because they never work the same, or look the same or feel the same anymore. The trick is knowing when to “Fix or mend” and when to throw it away. I’m afraid I haven’t figured that out either Carmen. I’m an optimist, so I guess I think that nearly everything can be fixed or repaired. So that’s what I end up doing…LOL…and a lot of the time I find out differently but, every once in awhile, something stays fixed, mended or repaired and I feel so glad I took the time to fix it and not given up on it.

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    • Bruce, I’m an optimist too — I guess I didn’t think about it that way. I keep thinking that I lost out on something by walking away — but, maybe you’re right: the trick is knowing when to fix them. Hmmmm…and you have no insight into that? Darn!

      Thank you Bruce! 🙂

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  2. Where does one start on your profound discussion. The world after all is “Broken” on so many levels and it seems as though it is our responsibility to fix that which we can, while we can. This allows us to experience the joy and pain that resides hand in hand in the bosom of our fragile souls. Being broken is part of our make up, the sooner we can accept and nurture it, the stronger we become. We live in a world where it is often easy to walk from something that is broken…and maybe selfish too…That is not to say that one should endure something that is both toxic and painful, but there is a huge difference between this notion and that of a broken situation that is mendable. I’ve come to believe that our living interactions (and i extend that to all the creatures that live on the planet) are what matters. Although a true artist can live almost of their own flesh, this is rare. We need each other with our defects and brilliance, broken or not to help us understand and make sense of this planet we inhabit.

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    • My Billy.

      Thank you. I guess it is quite selfish to walk away — you’re so right. I think I’m still learning what is toxic, what I can fix and when maybe the best thing for me to do sometimes is understand I can’t fix everything.

      So much to think about…

      Abrazo.

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  3. Carmen,
    I share your point of view.
    I am usually not trying to fix broken ‘things’ after two attempts. What for? I did my best and it doesn’t work for me anymore. I think it would be much more better to bless and let them go in this case. No anger, no pain any more for all. Nobody is broken. Letting people go we give them another chance for better relationships. It is not selfish. When we try to fix everyone or everything, that is selfish. Are we so powerful? Is everything depend on our wish? The only and best way to help someone sometimes is to go away. To be honest, we try to mend or fix broken things not for the reason to be responsible for them. We addicted to them somehow.
    Helen.

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    • Oh Helen you are so right! It is a selfish thing. Wow. I think I have to write more blogs asking questions because I learn so much from everyone else’s answers! Thank you so much! XXOO!

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