November 29, 2020, Sunday 7:51am

Today’s topic is about soulmates.  Ha! 

Someone tweeted a question “have you met your soulmate?” and the responses were both hilarious and quite sad…

Some people wrote that their pets were their soulmates. Others had said that they had met their soulmates and they’d passed away or had dumped them.  All of those answers made me so sad…and scared! 

Others were almost too gleeful in acknowledging that they had met their soulmates – not realizing or caring, that most of us had never had the privilege or pleasure. “Married to my soulmate for 25 years” – one person mentioned.  Cool. Another mentioned they had met their second soulmate and had been together for 11 years… Those answers made me…jealous…for sure! 

I looked up the definition of soulmate:

Oxford definition: “A person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner…”

That seems pretty vague and open-ended for me. If that’s the definition of a soulmate then goodness, I guess I’ve had many?  My close friend game is pretty fierce and large?  Uhem.

But I’m 100% sure that’s not what people are talking about when they say a soulmate. It’s not what I mean at all.  What everyone is actually talking about is a romantic partner who is also a best friend.  More than a best friend. That person who qualifies as having that “zsa zsa zsu” – as so eloquently stated in the Bible of all TV shows on relationships, Sex and The City (Hahahahaha!).  It’s that special connection that is craved by most but seems so unattainable to all of us single folk…

I was trying to explain to a teenager what the zsa zsa zsu was and it might have been easier to just say it’s that inexplainable part of a great relationship that’s indescribable?  The part that isn’t about the physical or emotional but so intricate a piece of the puzzle between two people that makes them soulmates. That sounds about right.     

I’m positive I’ve experienced some levels of zsa zsa zsu, but I’ve never met a “soulmate”. I’m also not sure there’s just one soulmate for everyone, but I’m afraid to argue that point since I’ve never met my soulmate – so I can’t speak on it. I mean, I would think, had I met my other half – I would have noticed. Right?

So, I stay single. Yes, I’ve been told, more than once, I intimidate men and that this is my “problem”.  It’s such a cliche at this point, but I love that actually. Honestly, I don’t try to intimidate anyone at all. But if a man’s reaction to me is that they’re afraid of me, I’m thinking that’s more on them, than me. Their problem.  And yeah, I love who I am – and the man that does it for me would never be intimidated by me. Certainly a “soulmate” wouldn’t think that, right?  My hope would be that he’d be intrigued. Clearly, I’m not sure of that, but what I do know is I’ve worked way to hard to become the woman I am, so there’s no changing it. Nor would I want too, by the way.  Being single is far better than settling. I’ve seen that in too many couples to be envious of that in any way at all.

When I talk to my “brothers from another mother” best friends, they tend to agree that I may come across as intimidating at first, but remind me that society has been confusing strong women forever. We do the same in business and other situations…  regardless, Alden will tell you, after a minute or two, I’m not intimidating at all. If anything, I’m kind of a wuss.  All bark, no bite… (He says that on the phone by the way, never to my face.  Hahahahaha!). 

Why am I writing about all of this?  Honestly, I’m not sure.  Well, the soulmate thing on Twitter intrigued me…I think it’s pretty easy to say everyone, me included, wants to meet their other half. We’re all social beings after-all.  The idea that I’ve never met a man who could be that guy for me, kind of bums me out, especially when some people are on their second and third soulmates. So…yeah, as always, I’m just venting – and sharing!    

What I’m sure of is I would have noticed my soulmate.  I’m also sure it’s not something you can force upon a person.  That zsa zsa zsu is something magnificent. I can only imagine what it’s like when you have it with your other half.  I also know, it’s so powerful a force, you can see that kind of love in another couple who has it a mile away – that soulmate vibe is fierce. We’ve all seen it!  Those folk are the wealthiest people on the planet. And the idea of settling for anything less than that kind of love is just not in my game plan.

When I talk about wanting to be wealthy, that’s the kind of wealth I’m talking about. 

😊

Carmen