I Prayed In My Car

Yesterday, it rained.

This wouldn’t seem like a big deal to most, but I live in Los Angeles were “rain” is at a premium. 

Anyone who knows me, gets that I hate to drive to begin with, but hate it even more in mist, rain, darkness, anything but perfect sunny weather at this point. If I won the lottery today, one of the first things on my list would be to hire a permanent driver. I wish I was kidding, but I’m not. I’ve been saying this since I got my license as a teenager.  I’ve just never been a fan of driving and I don’t care about cars at all.  But, I do drive and yes, I drive well – just like everyone else thinks they do – it’s just not my thing. But, I had an appointment to meet with a client and since I’m a stickler for keeping my commitments, I went anyways even though when I started to leave, the rain was really coming down hard.  I can’t lie, I thought about cancelling for a second — okay, maybe more than a few seconds – Yaaasss, because it was raining!  I would have come up with another reason of course, like I was “sick” or something, but I truly considered ditching the meeting because of the rain.  Hee! 

Well, I went to my appointment.  And in case you missed it, I hate driving. I hate rain while driving even more. 

I prayed in my car. I did. Honestly, I realized yesterday that I do that pretty regularly. I’m not religious at all, but prayer (wishes, hopes, whatever you want to call it) is a part of who I am. People don’t know this about me – well, maybe one person does, the one who taught me this when I was a little girl, but every time I go by an accident, or see someone in distress, or just have a fear or need, I do a small cross at the top of my forehead with my thumb. Yes, I know, how very Catholic of me, but I’m not. I was “raised” Catholic, but I consider myself a recovering Catholic and actually, truth be told, I can honestly say, I hate the Church and most religion any day of the week.  But my faith in something “bigger” and “after this life” is on point and strong.  I also believe that whatever keeps me hopeful, empathetic, considerate and in joy, is a good thing.  Yeah, I pray most every day, maybe sometimes twice a day.   

I prayed in my car that my journey on the 405 & 10 freeways would be easy, that people would be kind, that other drivers would use their directionals (we call them blinkers – or blinkahs – in Boston). I prayed that my journey would be safe and that my car would not slip or slide and that my tires would hold out (the guy who changed my oil this year told me I needed new tires because they were worn out and then proceeded to show me the worn tread to make his point. This is in my head every time I get in my car. Thank you, mechanic guy.) – So, I did my little cross on my forehead with my thumb and went on my merry way. 

It was a lovely drive. I swear to God, or whatever you believe in, it was incredible! I mean EVERYONE used their “blinkahs” and even though there was one little mishap –  where a car tried to get into the next lane during a slow in the downpour while the opposing car was trying to do the same, they both noticed each other and one let the other by kindly. No horn honking, no middle fingers or exasperated looks – actually, there was a “It’s all good” wave by the person in the first car to the other car.  Seriously. In Los Angeles!  Amazing!

Now, do I think my prayer made that happen? Of course not.  I do not believe that’s how it works.  The God I believe in, isn’t messing with my head that way.  If that were the case, my “prayer” for a few million dollars would have already come true a long ass time ago!  Hahahahaha!  No, that’s not what prayer is for or about for me… 

When I pray, when I do my little cross on my forehead when going past an accident or seeing someone struggle, that pray is a reminder of my compassion. Prayer for me is about hope.  A wish that I be better than I used to be, no matter what happens. Prayer is what made me notice the best in people when a slight mishap occurred between two cars in front of me, in the rain, on the freeway, instead of being angry and frustrated that it ever happened at all.

Yeah, yesterday was a great day.

Goal: 100 Rejections

Someone once told me that I should have a goal of 100 rejections per year.

This had to do with my auditions and I know it sounds weird, but trust me, it’s an amazing concept!  And it can be applied to absolutely anything. The benefits of this kind of “reverse psychology”  are brilliant (in my humble opinion).

If you try for 100 rejections a year, then that means, at the very least, you’ve attempted 100 times to do whatever it is you’re trying to accomplish!

It also takes the onus off of “success” and just makes it sort of game. Can I do this and fail anyways? The pressure falls off and it becomes enjoyable to just try – somewhat light-hearted and…wait for it… Fun!

I love this principle. And here’s what I’ve learned in implementing it in my life: Eventually the law of averages takes over and you do succeed in some way shape or form. At the very least, you learn something. It’s kinda cool that way. I succeeded in my goals last year AND learned something about myself that was extremely important to my career and my life in general. It worked!

We all have goals – and my thinking is you should have a baseline: find a way to have joy most days in 2018. Happiness (JOY) is a thing! And setting myself up to have more joy in life is one of my goals for 2018. If something is not adding to my life, then I need to find a way to make it work or I need to let it go. This works for me. I hope it works for you too! And even if it doesn’t, maybe some variation of it does!  Please, at the very least, think on it. You deserve joy! We all do. We are here on the planet to love and be loved – of that, I’m extremely certain – do everything you can to stay in a good place. A positive space…

Happy New Year! I’m so glad you’re ON IT! No luck needed, but wishing you much joy in the process. And hey, I’ve already been rejected three times this year and it’s only January 7th! I’m so on my way to success. Looking forward to meeting you there! 🙂

Peace, love and all that good stuff.
Carm~

Doing. Being. Living.

Life always finds a way. . . 

I love that line.  It’s from the movie Jurassic Park.  No big whoop on the movie, but the line, uttered by Dr. Ian Malcolm, has always stuck with me.

I met quite a bunch of people these past few months and interestingly enough they have no idea what an amazing influence they’ve had on the life of this little writer-actor-worker-bee…

This is a simple THANK YOU!

Friends and family will always support you (well, one hopes anyways).  But somewhere along the way you have to reach out, take a leap of faith and see if you really have what it takes to do whatever it is you claim you want to do.  And as much as your friends and family will hoot and holler for you, and be by your side no matter what happens, it’s sometimes the people you don’t know that ultimately unveil a truth you may have never fully understood before.

Hmmm….it wasn’t the analysis of skills, or getting critiqued by strangers that mattered, but actually, taking that first step and jumping off a cliff that was the toughest part.  Finding a stranger catching and cushioning your fall… well, that’s something.  That really means something!

None of these folks are strangers at all nowadays.  Simply, they are friends.

And what have I learned?  Well, for one, that validating your skills and your dreams is something you really have to do for yourself.  But once you’ve come to a decision that you’re worth the gamble, actually deciding to leap IS all the validation you really need.

Who you are and what you’re meant to be, will always struggle to find a way to shine.  But you’ve gotta leap. You’ve gotta take the shot.

So no more  could’ahvs, should’ahvs, would’ahvs.

Now it’s all about:  Doing. Being.  Living.

Life always finds a way.

(Now, have any of my friends seen my Jimmy Choo’s? . . . XXOO…*smile*)